"The thing is, we don't really know what the future looks like. And that thought takes my breath away just as much as it calms me into a place where I am forced to enjoy this very moment."
 Kelle Hampton Bloom

Ever read some thing and it touches you deep down in your soul? You let out an AMEN and a long sigh. You want to share it with your husband because then he might understand why you respond the way you do because you are fighting a battle between the present moments and an unknown future. And this may help him gain the clarity he so desperately needs. Or anyone else close to you for that matter.

It defines life right now in our house. The desperate plea to hold on to the moments that seem to be drifting away so fast. The desperate plea to catch our breath when we are forced to look at and accept things changing. We want to be comfortable. Change is hard, unpredictable.

Breathe. Don't get ahead of yourself. Just breathe. I had moments this week where this became my mantra. (along with "just keep swimming" from Nemo)

Many things are changing for the good. We got amazing news that most people don't get in a lifetime, but at the same time, this news brings a lot of stress. It's hard when good news does that because most of the time you don't realize it's good news until you're sitting on the couch with your husband, and finally say "This is good, right?" Smiles slowly creeping over lips that were straight lines just moments before.

When the dust settles and I take 1 more second to breathe (insert mantra here), I can laugh about how news so good can throw me into a whirlwind of "what if's" and "can we really's" and "are we going to be okay?" and "will our girls understand?".

Take another second. Breathe.

We'll rally the troops (amazing, supportive) friends and family, get through the weeks and months ahead.

Again breathe.

And try to remember in the midst of chaos why we do what we do, and how blessed we are to do it.

oh the joys

A few things I've been thankful for:

1. A new pedicure tool for my feet. They are now on the road to recovery!

2. Zantac. After a few days of not feeling so hot, went to doctor, and she's thinking hernia. Still pursuing a more "natural" remedy, but thankful none the less.

3. My hubcap not falling off this morning, like I thought it had. While on the phone with Ben, he informed me that we don't have hubcaps, and the one I ran over was not ours. I, of course, was in a mad dash to get some where, and freaked out, thinking that my tire was going to fall off. Oh the craziness of stress; takes you to irrational places.

4. Walmart with Norah. Who knew shopping could be so fun with a toddler. Girl can talk, and she did! Pointing at everything, oohing and aahing. She's been showing off her mad talking skills lately.

5. Emma asking how many days until ____ (fill in the blank). I'll tell her, and she will say "I can count to ____(fill in the blank)." If only it worked that way!